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Wrap a loop of inner tube around the brake reservoir & fasten with a zip tie to hold the time card. Write times on the bar pad. Loosen brake & clutch lever clamps sufficiently so they will move if they bike is dropped. Carry a 21" tube, inflator, tyre lever, tow rope, spark plug, pliers, wheel/spark spanner, plastic bag to carry water/fuel. After washing your bike run the engine to dry the exhaust pipe, etc & grease the chain Towing - Tie the rope to the right footrest of the towing bike & pass it around the left footrest of the towed bike. Do not tie the bikes together. The towed rider secures the rope by standing on it but in an emergency can release it by raising his foot. A householder was woken up in the night by the sound of thieves breaking into his garage. He called the Police but was told that no one was available. A minute later he called the Police again & told them that there was longer a problem as he had shot the intruders. Within 5 minutes the house was surrounded by 6 patrol cars, a van load of armed response officers & the whole area was floodlit by a Police helicopter. The intruders were arrested. A Police Inspector confronted the householder. "I thought you said you had shot the intruders", he fumed. " and I thought you said there was no one available", the householder replied. If an unknown spectator offers you advice on the best route through boggy ground. Don't take it. Ride directly at him as he will be standing on firm ground. Dangerous hazards are marked with two crossed arrows & other hazards are indicated by groups of grinning marshals. If you & your mate are faced with a ferocious dog, don't try to outrun the dog, outrun your mate. Fit a grease nipple into your headstock. By forcing grease into the headstock water & dirt are forced out of the bearings. Carry a small padlock to pass through a hole in your disc/rear sprocket if you have to leave your bike unattended. Cut old inner tubes into strong rubber bands. Possible uses: Looped around the head steady to support a loose kick-start, looped around the swinging arm to support a loose side stand, wrapped around your bumbag to re-inforce the zip, wrapped around a file/machete tang as a replacement handle, etc, Check spokes tension when changing tyres or tubes Before tapping out worn wheel bearings check they are not secured in place by a circlip. Schedule 2, Section 67 of the 1988 Road Traffic Act allows riders to request a deferred test if they are stopped by the police for an "inspection". New wheel bearings can tapped into place with a socket the same diameter as the outer race. Don't eat or drink after an accident as you may require an anaesthetic. Check CO2 tyre inflating adapters are clear. New ones can be blocked when brazed. Hold CO2 cylinders with gloved hands when inflating tyres as the release of pressure causes the casing to freeze. Remember, if someone annoys you it takes 42 muscles in your face to frown but it only takes 4 muscles to extend your arm & give the bastard a slap.